Her Ring (Rose Quartz)

Given to her for strength

For balance

For peace

For love

My unconditional love, always

To help her love herself

Which I so desperately desired for her

And she so desperately needed

Custom designed specifically for her

Designed to calm her heart and mind

One of a kind for a one of a kind

Perfection on perfection

Once her source of comfort when we were apart

Now a source of pain and regret

Sadness

Hidden in a dark box, alone

Waiting for her to see the truth

Though we were not meant to be

It’s meaning remains

Some day, in a quiet moment of solitude

She will slip it on her dainty finger again

Smile and remember

Unconditional Love

My lasting love for her

Her ring

Hate Me

 

Thanks to bruisedbelly for helping me to post a song. (I’m a dork in a lot of ways, but her coolness prevailed)

In addition, she reminded me about THIS song.  It really captures the way I am starting to feel.

That maybe it’s good the woman I hurt for so long hates me in some way in order to find what is truly good for her.

Remembering all tears she cried believing I was “the one” for so long, I can’t say “I’m sorry” near enough.

Buttercup

Dappled sunlight on her skin

Mind adrift with carnal thought

Lustful stirrings, not quite sin

Lessons learned, but never taught

Her silken form does wait for me

Pleasures both forever sought

Undulating like the sea

Rolling as an evening storm

Foretelling lust that will be

Gentle rain, soft and warm

The love rains down sublime

Mind and body consumed in swarm

Bodies tangled in naked rhyme

Always knowing I’m her man

Each and every sultry time

Celestial rays form an alluvial fan

Dappled sunlight on her skin

Illuminates a greater plan

  This was not as easy as I had imagined.  Thank you to Der Erzahler at Der Erzahler’s Musings for the poetic form idea. His post “The Beast Within” was written in Terza Rima form and the above is my feeble attempt at the same and was written with a certain someone in mind….. I hope her belly is not so bruised at this particular moment.  😉

Her…..

Photo: Google Images (Alicia Witt)

This is NOT “her”, but……

damn if Alicia Witt doesn’t look like HER.

Add a few hot-ass tattoos and BAM, it’s her.

FUCK ME!!!  I was flipping through channels and my heart stopped.  The actress (Alicia Witt) looked just like HER. I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen and it was the fucking Hallmark Channel too!!   Yep, I watched an entire program on the damn Hallmark Channel just because the lead actress looked like her.  I didn’t care about dialogue, plot, etc.  Only that for a few moments I could “see her” again.   Funny how the heart works.

When I said……

 

When I said….

That you would be the one to leave

That I’m not a Knight in Shining Armor

That you would find someone better

That you would want someone more than you did me

That you would love someone more than you did me

That you would be truly happy

That I hoped for all these things for you

That it would hurt this badly to lose you

That you are, and always were Worth it

That you are not just a place to put it

That I would miss you so damn much

That I would think of you every day, EVERY DAY

That I would feel you in music

That embers of you would haunt and burn me still

That I would order (and not eat) an Olive burger just to imagine you enjoying it across from me

That I would miss your jaw popping as you chewed

That I would finally cry – for you

 

You didn’t believe me then.

Do you believe me now?

 

 

** Please no comments on the Jensen Ackles pic (Ooops, sorry T – Dean Winchester pic.  Hahaha)  It’s and inside thing (in case she ever reads this) that might cause her to call me a fucker under her breath, but still she’ll still smile.  Technically the entire piece is an inside thing, in addition to being cathartic in some degree for me.  Some days are more difficult than others and this weekend was ponderous.  Knowing she’s forgotten provides some degree of comfort because it means she is happy.  It also means I wasn’t as important in her life as she believed me to be.  She is blessed with object constancy issues and I am not a constant.  The fact is, I was blessed to be given what she gave of herself for as long as she could. She is perfect.  Damn, this turned into it’s own little sub-post.  LOL    Oh well, my blog my fucking rules.

Aching

Aching

We talk of love

Of sex and wanting

Life and all its twists and turns

Our conversations never seem to end

They seamlessly flow from day to night to day

With every single word and phrase

I feel it deep within my bones

Body crying out for you

An agonizing pull

Aching

 

Soft Sex

Right now I feel soft

for lack of a word

no roughness tonight

only whispers are heard

 

Touching you gently

effleurage on your skin

dancing lips down your back

stirring desire within

 

Taking our time

let’s make it last

now is for Us

the past is the past

 

I just need to feel you

from head and to toe

o’er each supple curve

my hands they will flow

 

To bring you such pleasure

my only desire

as your sweet release

pours gas on my fire

 

Slow and so steady

you feeling me full

inch by hard inch

with passions hot pull

 

Kissing you deeply

a resonant groan

my shuttering climax

brings mutual moan

 

 

 

I am Me (again)

I am the me that once was

The me I believe you once loved

The me I believe you once respected

Before I lost control

Control I never lose

But I did, because I lost You

I should never have shown you my weakness

The weakness you begged to see

The weakness I should have kept hidden from you

I knew better than to show it

So I trusted you to hold it

But you advertised it to the world

That is what hurts the most

All your demons I held

I still hold, privately, securely, safely and always will

They are safe with me

If only the opposite were true

But it isn’t, so….

These days I sit in reflective silence

Softly pondering the “what if’s” and “why’s” of it all

But the thoughts do not haunt me anymore

I am once again in control

I am ME once more

Stoic and poised as I should be

But the genie is out of your heart’s bottle

And you are not the type to forget

Or forgive

In the quiet moments of solitude

In the songs on the radio

And the constant melody in my head

You will forever dance

I found myself because of you

I lost myself because of you

I lost my mind for you

I regained control for my sanity

And now I can rest peacefully

Love always

Our Bath

A duet by:  nottooold2 and bruisedbelly

 

Warm water cascading down

your body covered in soap

how I love to watch you bathe

bubbles fill my mind with hope

I love your eyes on me

but what I’d love even more

climb in the tub with me

I want to caress YOUR form

Feeling your hand grasping me tightly

stroking with feverish pace

hand working like hell

but your eyes are locked on my face

Nothing brings me more pleasure

than giving pleasure to you

with you looking at me like that

that’s the only thing I want to do

Your focus on me intoxicates

losing myself in your grasp

with single minded focus

I shutter and gasp

My eyes shine with delight

as I smile with your release

now give me a big hug

and kiss me, please

– Thank for sharing a bath with me BB.  🙂

Better to be silent…..

Sometimes something seems just fine

It sounds perfect in your head

Then it leaves your lips or fingers

and you wish you were dead

 

An old saying reads as such,

Better to be silent and thought a fool

than to speak and remove all doubt

 

How easy that sounds

but in practice it is so very difficult

 

The disconnect between mouth and mind

rules the verbiage that we vomit

 

So here is the dilemma

do we speak our mind

at the risk being misunderstood

 

No, I say we do not

we speak what is in our head

what is in our heart

what will be, will be

 

Just remember to wash your feet………….